Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
