Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Randomize
