All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Let the clothes fall where they may.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
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