i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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