My boss' voice literally gives me gas
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Randomize
