We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Randomize
