this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Randomize
