nutella sex= disaster
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
