Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Randomize
