I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
