Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
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