your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize