i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Even my vagina gasped.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Randomize
