I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Randomize
