Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
should my penis look like a turkey
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize