guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
