u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
