Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
