I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize
