Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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