yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
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