On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Randomize
