How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
