But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Randomize