No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
You smell like stripper and shame
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize