I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize