walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
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