ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
