she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
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