Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize