CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Randomize
