fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Randomize
