So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
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