i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Randomize
