that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Dude, I just masturbated with my cat sleeping on my boobs....
You have GOT to get this crazy cat lady thing under control. I'm finding you a man. And you'll take him, and thank me. After that text, you have no right to be picky.
Randomize
