how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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