someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
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