Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize
