Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
