So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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