Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Randomize