Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize