Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Randomize
