Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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