What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Randomize
