google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
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