i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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