i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Randomize
