I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
