I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
