Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
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