I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Randomize
